If someone wrote a movie based on how I play with my son. Part I: Action movie.

Two men lie among blown-up vehicles of all kinds. The random vehicle components are hard to identify, as if they're all generic pieces that could fit any particular way into each other.
Man 1 (sitting up): I am going to build my space probe. I'm Han Solo.
Man 2 (also sitting up): Uh, me too. Wait, who am I?
Han Solo: Look at yourself.
Man 2: I seem to have a droid arm and the Joker's midsection and Princess Leia's head. This is very confusing.
Han Solo: No, you're Count Dooku. You're my sworn enemy.
Count Dooku: If you say so.
Count Dooku starts whaling on Han Solo.
Han Solo: NOT YET. First we have to build. All these pieces (sweeps hand toward left side of barren field) are for my deploying space probe. You have to use those other pieces.
Count Dooku: But there are only, like, a few wheels, and an axle. What can I build?
Han Solo: (shrugging) I don't know.
They build for what seems like hours. Count Dooku keeps giving up and lying down, until Han Solo yells at him to get back up.
Count Dooku: This is boring. Can we fight now? Or something?
Han Solo: Time to fight. Okay, I'm going to blast you with my space probe.
Count Dooku: I don’t think space probes are meant for blast—
Han Solo: You've been blasted.
Count Dooku: Oh, hell.
Han Solo: You're dead. Lie down.
Count Dooku lies down. Han Solo just stands there. Then he throws himself to the ground as well.
Roll credits.

Comments

[tsc]

Hysterical. This exactly how my son and I play, especially the lying down until Han Solo yells at me.

[Greta]

This is Jung's Collective Unconscious in action. I think all boys play this in some version or another depending on their particular cultural literacy.

Think of how this could have played out in Ancient Greece. Only, not Sparta because there it wasn't a game and their moms were nowhere in sight.

[DM]

My God, this is brilliant. I would so watch this movie. Especially if things blow up. I like it when things blow up.

[Kristen]

Whoa! this is how I play with my sons too! the lying down part is my favorite.

[Meredith]

I just love that you are the one wanting to fight! I also get yelled at for lying down a lot.

[Melinda]

Thank you for the big smile, that is what I needed on a Monday.

[Elizabeth_K]

He'll write a book someday on having the best mom EVER.

[Twice Five Miles]

This is hilarious. My son is only 16 months but I'm looking forward to this stage!

[Sarahd]

It's not just me!!??

[shriek house]

Further proof of my theory (based on my similarly-behaving children) that all this action hero play is really an excuse for our kids to be Director for a while. It's all about the setup and the bossing.

[Jasmine]

How funny!

[Maureen at IslandRoar]

Too cute; I love it.
Brings back lots of great memories.

[Nicole]

This made me smile.

[Swedish Pankakes]

I was waiting for you to say that YOU were Han all along.

[Fawn]

I never comment because you always have so many comments. And you almost always make me laugh, but THIS time I REALLY laughed, and I just had to say, damn, you are hilarious. There's a reason I keep you in my reader even through blog-following cutbacks. :)

[marta]

A propos of nothing.

I swear by your "Blogs I like" list. It is compiled in good faith and includes excellent writers. The new additions surprise me. These seem to be merely product placement and/or business advancement blogs. Would you care to elaborate on the rationale behind listing these?

[tomncristy]

I don't have kids, but I've played this game with my little brother and now his kids, and it's so much fun to watch their imaginations at work. No story has to be perfect; it just has to be fun! :) Great post!

[Soph]

I love this.
And it actually sounds a lot like how we used to play with our Barbies, except Ken's not in the middle of a 10 minute diatribe about losing his head under the dresser for the third time this week.

[Alice]

Marta:

I don't understand. I added a couple of blogs that I've come to know and love. I would not define any of them as you have.

[marta]

I may be wrong. Let me go back and do my reading. I trust your judgement immensely. Lie down, Luke and finish up that third paragraph! I implore you!

[Alice]

Thanks, Marta, for giving the blogs another look!

Communicatrix and Fluent Self I consider self-improvement blogs; Oh Happy Day I just love because it makes me happy; and then there are Diamond in the Window and Liz Under the Bridge, both written by people close to my heart, and I've written about them before. Those are the only new blogs I added recently.

[Sam]

Cracking up right now. I have 3 boys - age 7, 4, and 6 months, and your short little play sounded like my entire summer. Hilarious!

[feefifoto]

I think I could be very good at that playing dead thing.

[Erin@TheLocalsLoveIt]

Note to self: Play games that require one person (preferably mom) lie down for extended periods of time. Got it. Brilliant.

[Franca Bollo]

Oh, lord ... replace you with me, Henry with my niece and the random vehicle components with Polly Pocket pieces. Dante's 10th Ring of Hell is losing one of Polly's microscopic shoes.

[bea]

When's casting? I could totally play Count Dooku.

[Tracy]

I'm pretty sure Count Dooku had been knocked off (blasted?) before Han Solo came around.
A sure sign I have been playing/listening to endless chatter/quizzed on Star Wars topics FAR TOO MUCH!
I think of my characters lying down and playing dead as making it "fun" for my son... I mean, he really wants to win doesn't he?

[Kendra]

I actually enjoy all the building (especially since all our games prominently involve Legos). I was the one who never got around to playing Barbies because I was so busy setting up her house. But my 6-year-old actually wants to play! And sing theme songs to the movie he's making! So I end up feeling all arm-flailing incompetent, because I don't know how to make up stories, only how to set up for them in advance. I guess I'm the set designer in this movie.

[Masked Mom]

Reminds me of when my boys were little. My older son had a guy say: "Fire at will." and my younger son's guy said, "Who's Will?"

They're a junior and sophomore in college this year. I kind of miss all the "action" around here--ok, not really.

[Christian]

Oh when I read your blog I always think you are the funniest thing out there. I have a 5 y.o. boy and your posts just make me laugh so damn hard. I need to read your stuff more often, it so cheers me up.

[Lisa]

Oh, Count Dooku, Count Dooku. That is so my life.

I loved Star Wars growing up, and pretty much all my life, until my kids got obsessed and now I got blasted and light-sabered about 50,000 times a day. Now I'm about as enthusiastic about it as, well, you.

Loved this. Needed that laugh.